What is deception?

I decided to write on the word 'deception' because the last few blogs and responses have alot of talk about the phrase, "wolf in sheep's clothing".

Here are some synonyms...which, depending on what or who is involved, could be deceiving in itself, right?

trickery, double-dealing, deceit, dishonesty, fraud, chicanery, subterfuge, duplicity, mendacity, untruth, dupery, insincerity, indirection, craftiness, circumvention, juggling, treachery, treason, betrayal, pretense, disinformation, falsehood, trickiness, trumpery, beguilement, cozenage, humbug, hypocrisy, lying, sophism, deceitfulness, equivocation, prevarication, cunning, artifice, guile, misleading, deceiving, imposture, imposition, bamboozlement, snow job, skullduggery, flimflam, blarney, hanky-panky; dishonesty, hypocrisy.

I wanted to include some of those related words because sometimes a word that means the same thing can trigger you and make you think, "Oh yeah! That happened to me!"
For instance, I have been a victim of fraud but also encounter hypocrisy on a daily basis.
We think it's someone from the opposing team, the inlaws, opposing religions, opposing political parties...opposing countries. But to be TRULY deceived means quite often, you had NO clue.

You could be deceived by a magician, they trick you but you sort of expected it. A band playing a certain type of music with a certain look could be deceiving, but that is elementary-level sleuthiness to figure out their message. A car salesman tricking you is a form of deception but really, we see it coming. When you look at someone and you have left a 10th of a percent of doubt there, you aren't truly deceived. But, when you truly thought, "This guy's the real deal" and they sucker-punch you, you are left with WTF?

Have you ever taken a hit to the center of your chest by someone you admired? By someone you followed? By someone's title being the opposite of their actions?

Children raped by their parents or church leaders. That is an unbelievable form of deception. When you have been married 25+ (what you thought were loving) years and they cheat on you. That is unexpected deception. When the person who gave birth to you deceives you...THAT is overwhelming deception. I have followed many Hollywood stories over the years where a child turns around and sues the parent for dirty business practice. Isn't that also deception at it's finest? When your own parent does it to you and you could have sworn they'd be the last?
We are constantly being warned about being deceived and yet we look for all the usual suspects!!!

I have a laundry list of people who have deceived me and guess what? They came from inside my very close inner circle. From inside the family, from inside my church, from inside the cause I was fighting for, from inside my various teams and groups I have been a member or supporter of. The same people who I got to sign crucial documents have done it. It's not enough for someone to have their fundamentals in place. It's not enough for someone to say all the right things.

What I have found very helpful is not to look at the promises of any one person, but their motivation...essentially their heart. People will have a track record of being trustworthy when the motivation of their heart is in the right place. For me, purpose-driven people keep my trust above those who are driven by their goals (to the point of stepping on anyone to get what they need or bad-mouthing them). A person who puts themselves that high won't blink twice before stepping on heads. Many people who are really driven by their own selfishness try very diligently to come off as being good. I think it's important to look at the small cracks in their foundation as opposed to the paint chipping from the walls.

Something I also equate to true deception is the feeling of wanting to throw up after. If you half-expected someone to double-cross you, it hurts, but you prepared yourself somewhat. But when you take a huge gasp of air in and think, "OMG! How could they?" and you pace your floors in the house wondering if you should pick up the phone or find a weapon... that is when it's happened to you.

It's difficult to keep an eye out for the potential of anyone deceiving us and it can breed paranoia. But if we keep a close eye on the motivation of people, we can be supportive of those who have a loving and good heart as opposed to supporting something that can be destructive in the future.

This shouldn't be confused with people screwing up, we all do. But as you know there are some huge issues at everyone's table right now and the potential deception looming can be harmful from a domestic level all the way up to a global scale.

My motivation in it all? After having a very sore, bruised, shredded heart, I'd like to minimalize the pain in everyone else's. Pretty simple. It doesn't feel very nice.

Now the trick is to find an inspector to assist in looking for the cracks who is trustworthy,

"Life is the art of being well deceived; and in order that the deception may succeed it must be habitual and uninterrupted." ~William Hazlitt

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